Twas the night before Christmas and all through the office
Not a keyboard was clicking not a tweet in the air
The website was up and the servers were humming
In hopes that new customers soon would be there.
The employees were leaving with bonus in hand
with visions of vacations to far off lands.
And the VPs were huddled in conference room B
hoping to get out, their families to see.
When down in the warehouse there arose such a clatter
We sprang from the table to see what was the matter.
Down past the lunchroom we all did run
right past Joe the Janitor who was dressed like a nun.
The light from the flood lamps gave an ominous glow
and lit up the workers in the loading dock below.
And what did our wondering eyes first see
but a group of UPS drivers with shorts to their knees.
There was a guy with a clipboard, so lively and quick
We knew in a moment is was our accountant Nick.
He checked off the products as they flew toward the door
as he whistled and shouted and yelled out for more.
A widget, a doodad, a fuser, a fitzen
a jammer, a whammer, a thingamaglitzen.
To the trucks they did rush from far down the hall
Now ship away, ship away, ship away all.
And then in an instant, we heard a soft voice
We couldn’t be sure, but it sounded like Joyce.
An intern from marketing, she had all the tools
she was armed with the knowledge she’d learned at two schools.
She was dressed in her sweats
her laptop in hand.
On her earbuds she was listening
to some hip new band.
Her eyes how they twinkled, her smile so bright.
She was laughing and giggling, it was quite a sight.
When she saw us watching, she ran to our place
as if she was winning a gold medal race.
She had cracked Google’s code while skipping her lunch
and the clicks started coming, it was more than a hunch
The analytics would prove that the traffic was real
but the conversion to orders was what made us squeal.
So we all left the office on a day with record sales
we shipped so many packages we broke all our scales.
And we heard Joyce exclaim as she drover her Prius out of sight,
I’m taking tomorrow off, it’s been quite a night!